since i was 16 i am already the so called independent, working on my own, paying for my own bill and school. It was fun it adds a bit of someone else pride but i just notice that every time i came home "well i still call it a home" i am treated more like a guest than a family. It's not that i' complaining not helping in the household chores is not my kind of thing anyway, it's just that it's different, back then when i was still living with my parents i have to do this and that for my self i can still remember daddy's coffee every morning but then when i tried to make him coffee just like i use to back then he said i should let my younger sister do it.
It feels so strange when i have to ask where is this and that when i spent half of my life in that place and nothing has changed that much. I use to just storm in my sisters room to get extra sheets/pillows and she don't mind but now i feel different i have to knock and asked her to give it to me. (no body asked me to i just feel like i have to) my sister used to just enter in my room and ask for this and that, she even know where i hide my novels and i don't mind (back then mom wont allow us to read romance novels)but now when she needed something she knocks and don't inter until i told her so. Even my four bedroom wall physically nothing has changed i still have it's key and no else have a duplicate i still feel like i'm a stranger to this room.
It's so sad but sometimes i feel more at home in Hotels, motels, transient houses where i spent my nights during travels than in my own bedroom. I feel more comfortable in my convertible sofa in my office than in my own bed at home...
is it just me or it's just something normal...??